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PETA nuts are mad at fly-swatter Obama

The nutty PETA humans are buzzing like flies and other pests after watching the fawning media reports about President Obama swatting a fly.  There are really three stories here, all demonstrative of how annoying pests can be:

1.  The fawning liberal-left-winged (they lack a right wing) media pests are in fits of Obama buzz, again, this time over the simple but now apparently amazing, historic, super-human (possibly God-like!) fact that a mere man was able to swat a fly.  During a TV interview.  Oh how awesome.  This is a change we have waited for.  And can believe in.  Let us sing. 

Since my untrained dog was able to do it daily, and far more impressively inasmuch as she didn’t have hands and the flies weren’t usually suffering under the heat of TV studio Kleig lights, I’m not nearly as impressed with Obama’s “Ninja”-like abilities (actual word used by CBS News in one report;  or more appropriately, the “cat-like quickness” reported over on NBC News’ report). 

CTV on the story again2.  As if on cue, the nutty pests at PETA, whose militant reaction-time to the human-induced death of any life form or bird egg (except human babies in the womb) are quicker than any Ninja, and who think humans are the biggest pests of all the life forms on Earth (which should be spayed or neutered at government expense, no doubt), took exception to the Presidential fly swat, saying (yes, actually saying this) that the Ninja fly-killer in chief should try to take a more “humane attitude” before his next fly-swat.  To that end, they are sending President Barack Obama a “Katcha Bug Humane Bug Catcher”, which is ostensibly a gizmo to trap a fly and then release it outside.  Where evil birds can eat them. 

Of course this gave the media another chance to feature the awesomeness of the Obama fly-swat.

3.  The fly itself.  This went completely unreported.  The fly was a member of al-Qaeda.  And yet President Obama didn’t read it its Miranda Rights nor offer a free taxpayer-paid lawyer or a full trial in New York traffic court, prior to his taking aggressive, offensive, preemptive, U.S. imperialist action and imposing its culture on it by killing it, even though the fly never actually attacked America, or Obama, and was merely looking for a dung pile and confused Obama for one. 

Nor did he, for the first time since being sworn-in, apologize to the fly community or anybody else.  Damn neocon. 

Unfortunately this makes Obama a “war criminal” in the eyes of his leftist wing, which are quickly becoming pests even to the war criminal Obama.  I suggest a “truth commission” followed by a “war crimes tribunal” and of course impeachment.

Oh and also the fly was gay.  Dear. God.

Joel Johannesen
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